If you've ever waited at a bus stop downtown, you might have chanced upon one of those Cornetto advertisements proclaiming, 'Love is like waiting for the bus. It never appears when you want it to.'
All unnecessary reminders of our love lives aside, it's not hard to see how Cornetto made that connection. Relationships break down, speed up, get delayed, and lose direction all the time. But as everyone who has ever experienced an early morning train fault knows, all is forgotten once you actually arrive at your destination.
In the meantime, here are 10 more love lessons we've learned from our morning commutes:
1. The thrill of the chase
In the same way you might feel stupid running for the bus, it's easy to feel self-conscious when you're pursuing someone who's just out of your reach. But if you can make it, good for you! If not, sit tight - there's another prospect on the way.
2. On the right track, but on the wrong train
It happens to the best of us. You jump on the East-West line at Kallang en route to your office in Tanjong Pagar, only to realise that you've accidentally taken the train heading to Pasir Ris instead of Joo Koon. So if you keep arriving at the wrong destination - that is, into the wrong relationships - it might be because you're going about things the wrong way. You're putting yourself on the market, which is good, but you keep veering toward guys who are bad for you. Switch directions and you might just see things change for the better.
3. Count your losses
Have you ever waited 45 minutes for a delayed bus, but refused to jump into a cab, using the logic, 'I've waited for the 166 this long, so I'm going to take it no matter what'? Even though the journey home would take you another 45 minutes on top of the time you've spent waiting? It's stubborn and can save you money, but it's not effective - better to count your losses and just splurge on a direct ride home.
Same goes for relationships. It's easy to spend years and years waiting on a very specific type of partner (rich! handsome! educated overseas!), when somebody else could make you just as happy.
4. The fastest route is the most expensive one
The fastest way of getting anywhere is via a cab, but it will be expensive. Getting married early can be nice, but it's also going to cost you. You will give up the prospect of seeing what else is out there by just going for the first guy you get serious with. If you have children early, you might have to compromise a high-flying career and social life to take care of them. If you're ready to fork over the priceless freedom of youth for the ball and chain, then great! Just make sure you won't regret it later.
5. Love is unpredictable
One of the first things smartphone users download when they get a new device is the bus and train app. With just a couple of taps, you can know roughly when your bus will arrive - but as anyone who has used one of these apps knows, they're never 100 per cent accurate. Same with love - you can analyse it all you want, but it's still going to surprise you.
6. Skip the crowd
If you've ever been to the City Hall train station during rush hour, you'll know that it's usually better to skip a packed train to wait an extra couple of minutes for the next one. If pursuing the object of your affection means dealing with a crowd of exes, competitors, and homewreckers, well, how about stepping back and looking for someone more available?
7. On being a late bloomer
Have you ever cursed the fact that you worked slightly overtime, only to realise that you got home earlier than usual because your bus didn't have to crawl through rush hour traffic? Getting a late start in your love life is frustrating, but dating only once you're a bit older means that you get to bypass the often unnecessary angst and drama of youth relationships.
8. Cultural differences
MRTs, cabs, and buses exist in every country, but trust us: if you grew up with SBS/SMRT, you're going to be a little disoriented the first time you take the New York subway. At least that one has signs in English. Imagine navigating through stations with signs predominantly in Japanese or Korean. So when dating someone from a different culture, you can expect all the same basic elements of a person, but don't feel too bad if a few things get lost in translation. You'll get it eventually.
9. The right and wrong way to make an exit
All right, the flames have died, and it's time to bid your S.O. adieu. Breakups are uncomfortable at best, so make sure you take the best exit when parting ways. Think of it like getting off a train - while it's tempting to just head up to the nearest exit, a little time spent studying a map could save you up to 10 minutes of extra walking once you're actually outside. When leaving a relationship, do it efficiently, with thought, and with a sense of direction.
10. Train faults aren't fatal
How could we write an article about public transport without addressing all of the recent train malfunctions? A couple of months ago, we got stuck at Paya Lebar for almost 20 minutes waiting for the train ahead of us to move. In the end, our train had to push that train along the track until it started going. Sometimes, a relationship gets stalled not because you're with the wrong person, but because circumstances block its progression. At worst, these circumstances, such as a problematic career, emotional problems, or financial difficulties, can put an end to your love altogether. But at its best, a strong relationship can push those things into motion and out of sight.
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